Spare a thought for the tireless care home workers this festive period

One of the most heart-breaking things I’ve ever had to do as a care home manager was turn away family members who wanted to visit their relatives during the pandemic last Christmas.

Of course, we had to be practical and follow government guidelines so that no outbreaks occurred – and thankfully they didn’t – but I’ll never forget how stressful it was.

I love my job because it means I get to help people every single day. I just wish more people truly knew the sacrifices care home workers have made throughout this pandemic.

I was 12 years old when I moved to the UK in 1972 after being kicked out of my home country – Uganda – by former president Idi Amin. At the time, the dictator ordered all non-Ugandans out of the country, including the estimated 50,000 Indians who had immigrated to Uganda at the insistence of the British to help build infrastructure in the former British colony. 

It was a shock to my system when I first arrived in England.

I was so cold as soon as I got off the plane and I didn’t own a warm jacket, but luckily my auntie lived in Derby and had come to receive us, with some coats. Her home was a terraced house and I used to feel I’d bang my head if I walked in, since I lived in a big high roofed house in Uganda. 

My father was a well-known wealthy man back home and I was used to living a nice lifestyle. I kept asking to go back home but my mother sat us down and explained that we will never be able to do that and need to learn to settle with what we have for now. 

So, I went to school in Derby and after, I worked in a chemist as a shop assistant and part-time as a catwalk model. This led me to travel a lot, which helped me learn a lot about different people – including learning to speak seven languages. 

I met my husband in 1984 at a party through a mutual friend and we married in 1986, then I studied psychology and sociology at university. 

After I finished my studies – and perhaps because of things I learned – I started to notice people in my area in Derby looked really sad and were isolated. I wanted to change the way people viewed the older generation – not recognising them for their experience and unique skills.

So in 1999, I decided to open an organisation called Young Heart that allows older people to do activities like dancing and light exercises to help motivate their lives.

The activity group was managed by volunteers and a team of charity workers – and led by me. After three years, we had no more funding to carry on so I started qualifying as a nurse in 2003 and completed my training three years later.

Within my first year as a staff nurse at a care home, I started to realise home how managers treat their staff and that sort of experience drove me to want to work as a manager.

Ever since 2010, I have managed various nursing homes and care homes. I like to build relationships with my staff and service users to make them feel valued because I believe that everyone should be appreciated for whatever role they do.

When the pandemic first hit at the start of last year, my staff and I were worried about the impact on our care home residents. I was working 30 miles away, so I had to travel from Derby by train. 

For a whole month, taxis and buses didn’t operate in Derby due to lockdown so I couldn’t get to the train station and my director had to provide me with private transport for one month.

The feeling of working throughout the pandemic was scary. I was anxious all the time seeing the number of cases rising and hearing the news about care homes and residents getting Covid-19. 

We didn’t have an outbreak of cases because I made sure we were properly prepared. We stopped visitors, all wore masks, limited groups, washed our hands constantly, ensured residents were safe at all times and made sure that anyone who didn’t feel well did not come to work. 

To be frontline staff and putting our lives at risk, all I could think about was my family and if I’ll survive the pandemic. 

I had sleepless nights, I didn’t eat properly and it’s not easy working long hours all covered up and ensuring everything is clean. Then I’d come home, leave my clothes outside in a bag, shower and wash my hands because I didn’t want to put my husband at risk. It made us both feel quite stressed because we couldn’t be normal.

I could not see my family except for my husband because I couldn’t risk contracting coronavirus from them and then bringing it into the care home. I went without seeing my children and grandchildren for almost six months and only saw them on WhatsApp.

I had to go to work and keep everyone safe and happy, while I was worried about my family that I couldn’t see or care for. I have two sons and one daughter, who is also a nurse. I also have six grandchildren. 

On Christmas Day last year, I was on call in case of emergencies, so I only saw my husband, but even then, I wasn’t able to completely relax. I kept getting calls from staff. For this reason, I had a miserable day because I felt like I was letting everyone down by not being fully present. 

I was really worried about my residents too, because they couldn’t spend it with their families that so desperately wanted to see them. It felt like we were all making sacrifices. 

I am not working throughout the festive period again this year and I hope it will be better. But I am terrified and feeling anxious that there may be another lockdown and I will not get to spend time with my family. I may still not be able to see some of my children or grandchildren due to Omicron.

Every year, my children come and we celebrate Christmas. I just can’t bear the thought of another horrible and miserable festive period. 

I feel Covid-19 will become the next flu and having a jab to protect ourselves will be the new norm as well as wearing masks. We can combat this if we all follow the guidelines and help keep one another safe. 

As told to Minreet Kaur

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