My dad, 59, died 10 weeks after discovering the true cause of his stomach ache – doctors just fobbed him off
FOR months, Gary Buesnel was back and forth to see doctors, complaining of stomach aches and pains.
Yet repeatedly, medics told the 59-year-old he was “fine” – putting his symptoms down to a hernia, and gallstones.
Days after Gary was finally referred to hospital for scans and tests, he was told the true cause of his stomach pain – and 10 weeks later he died.
It was pancreatic cancer – one of the UK’s deadliest forms of the disease, with a five-year survival rate of just 7.3 per cent.
But had Gary’s illness been caught earlier, he might still be here – something his daughter Leah Buesnel-Sharpe still struggles to come to terms with almost five years later.
She tells Sun Health: “My dad had pain in his stomach, he’d lost a lot of weight and his appetite decreased.
“That really wasn’t like him, so these should have been red flags, but instead doctors kept saying he was ‘fine’.”
There are around 10,800 cases of pancreatic cancer every year in the UK. Some 9,600 people lose their lives.
Gary, from Gorey, Jersey, was one of them.
“He hadn’t been well for about a year,” Leah, 40, says.
“He was back and forth to the doctor, and they said he had a hernia.
“His symptoms worsened and he went to A&E, but they just sent him home, telling him he was ‘fine’.”
Gary, known to friends as Bugsy, went back to the doctor the following week and was sent straight to hospital. This time, he was kept in for tests.
“I just knew somehow that it was going to be really serious. I felt it was going to be something really bad,” Leah, mum to five-year-old Axel, says.
“Doctors thought he had gallstones but scans revealed something on his liver, so he stayed in overnight.
“That was scary enough. But days later, on Pancake Day in 2020, it was confirmed – he had pancreatic cancer. And it had spread.
“It was stage four and doctors didn’t give us any treatment options. I know now that’s because there aren’t any.
“We were left crying in the room with no information or hope for the future.”
Desperate to keep her dad alive, Leah began researching their options.
“We visited a private doctor to see if they could do anything to relieve his pain, and that’s when the worst news possible came,” she says.
“The doctor said, ‘This is really urgent. You’ve got eight to 12 weeks to live without treatment.’
“I searched all over the world to find someone to treat him, but there was nothing.
“Obviously I now realise that by the time pancreatic cancer is diagnosed, it’s often too late.”
By the time I got to the hospice, he couldn’t even really have a conversation. It just happened so quickly
Leah Buesnel-Sharpe
From this point, as Britain was plunged into lockdown, Gary’s health deteriorated further.
“His bilirubin levels were really high and he turned yellow,” Leah, who works in a needle exchange, says.
“He had to go to the UK to have a stent put in because his bile duct was blocked, but because it was the start of Covid, he had to isolate for two weeks when he got back.
“He just got more and more unwell so I took him to the hospital and I think he had one session of chemotherapy.
“I thought it had gone really well because he moved in with us and I walked into his room and I saw him sitting up, eating a Mars bar.
“I thought, ‘Oh yes, this is going to work, he’s going to be OK’. But he wasn’t.
“That was the only session he managed to have. He just wasn’t strong enough after that.”
Despite the bleak outlook, Gary managed to keep smiling.
“He was actually surprisingly positive, which was not like my dad,” Leah says.
“He would usually always tell you the negative side of things because in his eyes, ‘You’ve got to know everything.’”
Gary spent the last few weeks of his life in a hospice as Leah could no longer care for him at home.
“He wasn’t eating or drinking,” she says. “He wasn’t even keeping down these little shots the hospital had given him.”
Because of Covid restrictions, Leah wasn’t allowed to visit her dad until the very end.
FINAL DAYS
“I got a call saying he had three days left,” Leah says.
“By the time I got there, he couldn’t even really have a conversation. It just happened so quickly.
“I didn’t realise it would be like that. I was under the impression he would be able to come home after he’d had medication for his pain.
“I got to stay with him for the whole three days, and I was next to him when he passed away.”
Gary died on May 15, a month before his 60th birthday – the day he was going to retire and “start living his life”.
“He worked for the forestry department, driving big machines and doing all the trees, until he got made redundant,” Leah says.
“Then he was gardening for a private firm, which was a very physical job.
“I think he struggled because he was in so much pain. It just seems like a waste of life.”
Symptoms of pancreatic cancer
PANCREATIC cancer doesn't always cause symptoms in its early stages.
As the cancer grows and you do begin to show signs, these may come and go and be unspecific, making it hard to diagnose, according to Pancreatic Cancer UK.
Common symptoms include:
- Indigestion – a painful, burning feeling in your chest with an unpleasant taste in your mouth
- Tummy or back pain – it may start as general discomfort or tenderness in the tummy area and spread to the back, which get worse lying down and feel better is you sit forward
- Diarrhoea and constipation – see a GP if you have runny poos for more than seven days, especially if you’ve lost weight as well
- Steatorrhoea – pale, oily poo that’s bulky, smells horrible and floats, making it hard to flush
- Losing a lot of weight without meaning to
- Jaundice – yellow skin and eyes, as well as dark pee, pale poo and itchy skin
Gary’s funeral was a small affair with just 10 guests due to Covid.
But more than 400 people lined the streets as his coffin passed, followed by a procession of motorbikes.
“He was a Harley Davidson owner, so that was really nice,” Leah says.
“He was so popular. Honestly, I’ve never heard anyone say a bad word about him. He was like this big gentle giant.”
Now, his family visit his grave regularly, and raise money for charities like Pancreatic Cancer UK every year.
Their house is also still full of photos of Gary so he is never forgotten.
“My little boy obviously doesn’t remember him because he was only nine months old when his pop passed away,” Leah says.
“But on his birthday, we always do something. I also talk about him all the time, and we’ve got pictures everywhere.
“My dad’s friends come to family events, which is really nice, as I feel like I still have a little link to him.”
If you feel like something is wrong, keep pushing. The pancreas is just hidden away inside your body. I didn’t know anything about it until my dad’s cancer
Leah Buesnel-Sharpe
She adds: “He was a real prankster dad. We’d have water fights when I was younger and he and my mum would always play jokes on each other, like hiding each other’s dinner and making the other one jump. He was just a bit of a joker.
“And he was so excited to be a grandad to my son. That was one of the hardest things. He had so many plans.”
Leah and her family now live in her dad’s house, which she describes as “bittersweet”.
“It was really difficult at the beginning, but I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else, and I definitely wouldn’t want anyone else to live here,” she says.
“I’ve got so many happy memories from when we were all together here.”
Pancreatic cancer is the fifth most common cause of cancer death in the UK.
It can affect anyone of any age, and it occurs equally in men and women.
Unfortunately, it has a five-year survival rate of just 7.3 per cent dropping to just five per cent after 10 years.
That’s because symptoms can be vague, and often mask as something else entirely.
According to Pancreatic Cancer UK, the most common signs include:
- Bloating
- Pain (usually in the abdomen or back)
- Digestive problems (e.g. poor appetite, indigestion, nausea)
- Jaundice (yellowing of the skin and eyes)
- Diarrhoea, constipation or both
- Unexplained weight loss
- Tenderness, swelling or pain caused by a blood clot
- A diabetes diagnosis
If you are concerned, speak to your GP, and don’t be afraid to push for answers.
Leah, who doesn’t want any other families to have to go through the same, potentially avoidable pain, says: “The trouble is, these symptoms can be related to so many other things, and they don’t look that serious at first.
“But if we all know they could be attributed to pancreatic cancer, why aren’t we not doing scans straight away? It’s one of the most deadly cancers.
“The pancreas is just hidden away inside your body. I didn’t know anything about it until my dad’s cancer.
“My message to everyone is – just shout the loudest, because that’s the only way people are going to listen to you.
“If you feel like something is wrong, keep pushing, or get a second opinion.”