I took my son to California for his birthday, and he planned the itinerary. Embracing my kids' interests helps me stay close to them.
Courtesy of Terri Peters
- I let my son plan a trip for the two of us to California for his 17th birthday.
- Throughout our trip, I was thankful for the time I've spent building our relationship.
- My son is passionate about his interests, and they're part of what makes him who he is.
When my son was younger, there were times I wondered whether he'd ever stop talking about his interests. From detailed stories of his latest "Minecraft" session to chattering about his favorite Marvel superheroes, it seemed there weren't enough hours in the day for him to tell me things. But whoever said "the days are long but the years are short" was right, and in a blink I found myself facing my son's 17th birthday — his last before technically becoming an adult.
My son and I still talk quite a bit, whether discussing horror movies or analyzing his dating life, but between his first part-time job and getting his driver's license, I see and hear from him less these days. For his birthday, I let him plan the itinerary for a trip to California — just him and me.
For nearly a week, we hit the Universal and Disneyland theme parks, saw movies in historic theaters, and ate lots of cheeseburgers. It was pretty incredible, both to spend dedicated time with him and to see him embrace the things that interest him most.
Embracing his interests over the years helped shape the trip
Courtesy of Terri Peters
I've learned the best way to stay close to my kids is to embrace what interests them. My son is very interested in film, so when he told me he wanted to "go to the restaurant David Lynch always went to" while we were in Los Angeles, I turned to Google. "Do you mean the Bob's Big Boy in Burbank?" I asked.
Lynch, the director behind "Twin Peaks" who died earlier this year, was known to visit the iconic restaurant for a coffee and a chocolate milkshake most afternoons, so we did, too. It was a seemingly silly stop, but one that will be a core memory for both of us.
We've always enjoyed going to theme parks together
Courtesy of Terri Peters
When my kids were younger, we visited Central Florida theme parks nearly every weekend. Now, they have their own lives and social schedules, so we go less frequently. Still, when we talked about a trip to California, my son said, "Can we go to Disneyland and Universal Studios Hollywood?"
It was a reminder that when you build memories with your kids when they're small, those things stick. We had a great time on rides at Disneyland and doing a movie studio backlot tour at Universal, things we may not have added to our itinerary had we not gone when he was younger.
He's developed his own interests, too
Courtesy of Terri Peters
My son's biggest request on our trip was to visit as many historic theaters in California as possible. While staying at Disneyland, we took a drive to Santa Ana to visit an arthouse movie theater he discovered while planning the trip. In Los Angeles, we saw "Sinners" at Universal CityWalk in 70 mm Imax, a filming style my film-enthusiast son said "was the way it was meant to be seen" and something definitely not offered in our small Florida town.
Film is my son's passion, so I was content to tag along. Part of growing up is learning what makes you happiest, and seeing my kid delight in visiting historic theaters and seeing a movie every single day of our trip made me happy, even if my vacation preferences are more along the lines of lounging poolside and trying distinctive restaurants.
I'm proud I've raised such an interesting human being
Courtesy of Terri Peters
Our trip wasn't just movie theaters and theme parks. My son also requested we visit the Academy Museum of Motion Pictures in Los Angeles and begged to visit stores that sold "physical media" (the film-nerd term for hard copies of movies) so he could add to his 4K Blu-ray collection. He ate 10 cheeseburgers over our weeklong trip, including two visits to In-N-Out Burger, a chain we love but do not have on the East Coast. Though I let him have the reins throughout the trip, I ended up having an amazing time, too.
Our routine has changed over the years, from storytime snuggles and Lego-building contests to college planning and navigating the teenage years. I'm so thankful I took the time to listen when he waxed poetic about video games and comic books for hours on end. Without those moments, he'd probably not include me in his interests today, and his interests are pretty cool, in my opinion.