You Weren’t There For Me But I Can Only Thank You

You weren’t there for me when I was afraid but I can only thank you for leaving me alone in the dark because it taught me how to walk alone in an empty street without any guidance and still find my way back home.

You left me to take care of myself when all I needed was a hand to hold but thank you for teaching me how to hold my own hand and how to ease the pain you put me through.

You weren’t there for me when I was struggling but I can only thank you because you showed me how selfish people can be, how they can only think of themselves when their loved ones are hurting and how people can never understand something that didn’t happen to them. You weren’t there for me when I wanted to lean on you but thank you for showing me how to lean on myself, thank you for forcing me to solve riddles and answer questions without your help. Thank you for showing me nothing because you made me see everything. 

You weren’t there for me when I was broken but I can only thank you because it taught me how to heal myself in ways you would have never known. It challenged me to work on myself so I don’t ever need you or ask for your help or ask you for favors. It pushed me to be the person I wanted you to be but most of all, it made me immune to your pain. You don’t get to me anymore. You can’t break me anymore. 

You weren’t there for me when I needed your love but I can only thank you because you taught me the lesson that keeps saving me, the lesson that makes me face all obstacles with tenacity, you taught me the importance of self-love, the importance of self-care, the importance of tuning out the naysayers and the haters and the nonbelievers. You weren’t there for me when I needed your love but you showed me that loving myself is the only way to get by. It’s the only weapon I need to fight your battles.

I’m not your victim. I’m not the result of your mistakes. I just took all the mess you made and created a masterpiece. You weren’t there for me but I can only thank you because if you were, I wouldn’t be who I am today and that would have been the biggest loss of all.