Brother Tells Babysitting Sister She's a 'F--- Up & Disappointment.' People Think He's 'Entitled' & Their Mom Seems to Agree
A woman said that her brother and his wife aren’t speaking to her anymore after a blowup fight over childcare.
Taking to Reddit‘s popular “Am I the A–hole” forum, a 28-year-old woman explained that she’d been helping her brother and his wife take care of their kids for about four years now.
However, she recently got a new job that is requiring her to take some time off helping the young family. In a heated argument, her brother called her a “f— up and disappointment.” Most people think it’s the other way around, though, especially after hearing how much she’s been getting paid to take care of two young children.
Keep reading to find out more…
In her post, the woman noted that her 25-year-old brother has two kids, with one around the age of four.
She’s been getting paid $100 a month for around five to six hours of helping out every day.
“I switched my work schedule to be able watch the boys after my overnight shifts and to better help him so he and his wife can still work,” she wrote.
She started to get “super burnt out” after they had a second child as she was balancing childcare with her own job. Since she worked nights, there were times when she was only getting three or four hours a sleep each night because her brother and sister-in-law would get home late.
“I tried to set boundaries but ultimately caved to their pressure along with my parents on their side,” she wrote, adding that they figured out a way to help her get at least five to six hours of sleep each night.
The Redditor said that she “gave them a 2 year timeline and told them if they had a third child I would be done watching them.”
Things changed when she lost her job and was out of work for a few months. After finally finding a new opportunity, she realized that there were two days that she wouldn’t be able to help out with the kids during orientation. The job also required her to work days.
When she reminded her brother about the upcoming orientation, they got in a big fight.
“I was basically told I’m a major f— up and disappointment that needs to grow up because when our parents pass he’s not going to keep bailing me out or helping me like [they] do, and that no one will be able to take those two days off and I have to watch the boys. Plus he claims I never told him it was a day shift job because that won’t work for him and f—s everyone else over, meaning they won’t have someone to watch the boys,” she wrote.
In a response to a fellow Redditor, the woman explained that her parents, whom she rents from, hadn’t been charging her rent while she was out of a job. This was seemingly what he meant when he said they were “bailing [her] out.”
“After a lot of tears on my part and arguing I told him I can’t pass up a job that’s willing to pay when I have no other job prospects at the moment and that I will be going to the orientation those 2 days this month and he has until the end of April to find alternate childcare,” she wrote.
After taking a stand, she said that her brother and sister-in-law no longer speak to her.
Fellow Redditors were infuriated on the woman’s behalf.
“Did I read correctly that they only pay you $100/month to watch 2 kids?? That’s insanely cheap,” one person wrote, urging the woman to “snag the job and don’t look back.”
Another agreed, writing, “HE is bailing YOU out? That’s laughable. Once he sees how much childcare costs for HIS children, he might see how much you’re bailing him and his wife out.”
Doling out some tough love, one Redditor pointed out that her brother “chose to have kids young” and “chose not to find a sitter and rely on you doing it for basically nothing.”
They told the woman to “please grow a spine here, tell him to shove his attitude where the sun don’t shine, focus on your life, and go low to no contact with him, his wife, and anyone else who supports this nonsense. Family is not free childcare. HE chose to have kids, YOU did not. YOU are not responsible for his needs.”
Thankfully, the original poster provided a positive update on one front: Her parents are seemingly taking her side.
“My mom actually took the two days I need for orientation off and told my brother if he has anything more to say about me asking for just two days this month then she can stop bailing him out as well and stop watching the boys too,” she wrote in response to one commenter.