My boyfriend’s attitude towards children could be a deal breaker
DEAR DEIDRE: Motherhood has always been something I looked forward to, but my boyfriend has started constantly droning on about the negatives of having children.
We got together five years ago and since then, we’ve bought a house, so surely it’s time to think about the children next.
I’ve been clear I want a family and he was always up for it.
He’s 37 and I’m 34 now so I feel my body clock ticking but he’s gone the other way. If I talk about having children, he says we can’t afford them.
If there’s a wildlife programme talking about global warming or news about a war he says, “Why would anyone want to bring a child into this world”.
His brother’s wife had a baby recently and I’ve bought her gifts and cooed over the baby girl but my boyfriend hasn’t even wanted to hold her.
I’m fed-up with his attitude and he’s now making me question our future together.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Perhaps his change of heart is down to financial stress or he’s worried about your relationship lasting. It is important that you find out because this is a deal-breaker for you.
There’s no real compromise to be had so it’s worth finding out if this issue can be resolved – sooner rather than later.
Find a quiet moment to explain to your boyfriend that you are concerned you’re no longer on the same page.
You can both find help in deciding what is right for you with some counselling. Find a counsellor through The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, (www.bacp.co.uk, 01455 883300).
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