The Mismeasure of Male Feminists
It’s hard to pinpoint the exact mix of emotions that come up when yet another male feminist is revealed to be less than enlightened towards women in his private life. There’s disappointment, yes, but there can also be a gotcha glee at hypocrisy exposed; joy at the downfall of a sanctimonious type. And that gut sense—I could have guessed—that a dude so proud of publicly checking his male privilege and so aware of why women might fear men, was a man women have reason to fear. But when the feelings fade what’s left looks strikingly like a double standard: Self-proclaimed male feminists are suspected of being hypocrites whether or not they’ve done anything yet to warrant that suspicion and when hypocrisy is involved, our bar for misconduct is lowered.
Sexual misconduct is not, of course, unique to men claiming woke-ally status. Newly-appointed Supreme Court justice Brett Kavanaugh comes to mind. But something changes when an accused man has presented himself in that manner. Partly it’s that when hypocrisy is at stake it skews the standards we apply. Behavior that might be judged as a personal failing if it came from someone we knew to be a flawed individual, looks worse coming from a self-righteous ally.