Liberating Myself Post-Divorce, Just in Time for Passover

Every divorce brings its own challenges, and one of mine is that I no longer get the cushy Passover gig I once did: an all-expense paid trip to some exotic locale where I got to bask in the sun while my husband worked. Now my children will be getting that trip—and I’m happy for them, I swear!—while I try not to sulk too obviously in a corner of my mother’s living room.

This is the first Pesach since I’ve become a mother that I will be without my kids for yom tov. This bit of news has inspired a lot of people to make comments that, though unintentional in their casual cruelty, would have cut to the core when I first got divorced two years ago: “You’re lucky you get such a long break.” “What a bummer! You must be so depressed.” “Didn’t you just take a vacation without them?” and so on. I would have spent weeks over-analyzing these comments, obsessing about whether people think I’m a bad mother. But having just turned 30 and having had plenty of time prior to that to contemplate my life thus far, I’m now able to shrug off these thoughtless observations with equanimity. And this newfound relationship with myself is truly the most liberating thing about Pesach.

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